wat's for christmas this year?

barely a wink and Christmas will be here soon! this year somehow seems to creep away really fast... from the beginning of the year till now, here are some "highlights" (in no particular order) in my life:

• major shifting in work which means NO BONUS this year.
• attempt to opt the easy way out by buying 4D and end up spending $289.
• lovely celebration for my bdae in Bali wif the girls in advance.
• a major decision to SHAVE my head in the name of charity (plenty of thanks once again)
• massive renovation activity for bf's house which some decisions get to be a "WE" instead of a "I"
• finally got a chance to fly my parents to china
• officially a mahjong addict

on going events and work just seems to keep me from festive seasons. i just hand over 2 job sites last week and one more to go this weekend. then i have to start another 3-4 more immediately. boss is running 3 himself. my weekdays and weekends are almost burned up with no scores of buying ANY presents for anyone yet...

i just feel so lost this year. nothing prepared with loads on my mind.

like my boss says: "the only break for our industry is probably only Chinese New Year"

life can be cruel when u least expect it.

i am feeling very down today. i dun know why.

i felt that my world is falling down right in front of my eyes... in a slow motion manner and yet i can't seem to reach the ends of it to push it up..

there are times when things dun get your way.
when u feel that u have been taken for a ride.
when u have been taken for granted even by the closest person in your life.
when u learnt that what u have been taught all these years from the day u were a baby is not preach the way it is.

i cried after such a long time. from sobbing to silent tears that slid across my cheeks..

cox there was a piercing pain in my heart that i wonder if how long it would take to recover....

i am not a good friend.. are you?

Didn't realised you updated your blog again after so long.. i tot you shut it down. it was just pure coincidence that i went in again to read your blog.

it hit me hard to know that u have left..
but why did you not tell us the truth when i ask you?why did you pretend that nothing happen and not share it with me?

i agree it is not that big an issue to kick up a big fuss about it. there wasn't anger but disappointment.. just loads of question marks in my head popping..

am i not doing my part as a friend? perhaps i didn't show enough concern for you to shun me away. maybe i should have make an effort to speak to you more often so there's no chance for you to drift.. i tot we have cleared the air the previous time and we promised to be truthful about our feelings..

i am wondering out loud if i've done enough to know your life.. if i am a good friend to you. i have to admit i am not...

but are you?

bingo!

been quite a while since i last blog.

busy with loads of stuff! birthday celebrations, work, mj and spending tme with gfs and bfs etc...

my boss is flying off to aussie as i am typing my post. he will be gone for a week and when he comes back it would be my turn! amazingly how we can run site this way but hey, we are a team! he's been sweet enough to let me rest for my flu while he manages everything else even though he's sick too. i felt damn guilty that i get to rest while he doesn't.. but that makes me appreciated him more and work harder for him.. hehehe

really hoping that the shanghai trip gives me time off to shop. and tonight will be the night my darling friends will "sponsor" some of the expenses thru mj. hehe

wish me luck!

XOXOXO

p/s: i strike 4D 2 weeks in a row! but hey, dun even consider asking a treat cox i bought i bet and won only 6 bucks nia.. hardly enough to cover my losses. *apes keeps fingers crossed* hope this winning luck follows me!